On Films

I am very random when it comes to films. I can’t say that I have a mood of some sort into these things, but I always find it exciting when it tackles history, wars (jampacked of dialogues carefully inserted civic government or societal issues) and, of course, humor.

1. La Haine (1995)

A French film about a group of three young men struggling to live from one of  France’s housing projects. the state of the area was pretty much a basket case. It was also then that a friend of theirs, Abdel Ichaha, was nationally televised being brutalized by the police shortly after a riot and now lies in a coma. One of them, Vinz, picked up a gun that a cop has dropped during the riot and vows to use it against a cop if Abdel dies.

Although it basically followed on the group’s whereabouts for the day (drug selling and using, general lurking into the city, getting random fights,getting busted by cops wearing civilian clothes and then letting them go, exchanging obscene puns, conversations with their mothers and sisters about behaving and money, school, principles and everything in between), the film greatly represented the group’s individual dreams, passions and misplaced but growing hate to the system. La Haine is The Hate translated to English; it came from Hubert’s words in one of their dialogues:” Hate begets hate” or roughly “Hate breeds hate”.


Aside from the magnificent plot, I am applauding this film because of its cinematography. It being black and white did nto limit its quality and angles and zoom panoramic techniques.

Hope you have a sit down with it someday.

2. Trainspotting (1992)

Familiar with La Haine’s plot, it’s also about a group of young English men n Edinburgh trying to be making sense of the world while getting high on cocaine. Renton, wanted out and to get clean but would always have his attempts futile because of his friends.

Humor. It’s scary humor is what got me into this film. It may be the scariest dark-humor film I have seen in my life. Spud’s choices and follow through is just so real to me I couldn’t quite place it. I do not know why is it so familiar to me.

3. Clockwork Orange (1971)

Pure Kubrick. A story about chaos and the great masterplan on alleviating it but later proving to be a failure.

A scifi suspense about a new world order of violence and insurmountable power. Revolving about Alex and his group, the film astounds you with qurky sets and odd dialogues. Their group ans wandering about and lands on a heist. Because of former betrayal of Alex to one of his group-mates, they revenged on him by leaving him in the middle of the robbery. While in prison, Alex then becomes a lab rat to a government lead psychological research on curbing from violence, lust, murder and other forms of evil by repeatedly showing him videos of rape, abduction and massacre. As the psychology worked on him, the tests soon became positive and Alex was allowed to be returned to society. The plot thickens when Alex had to dwell on the mess he left before going into prison and face his new life.

There was me, that is Alex, and my three droogs, that is Pete, Georgie, and Dim, and we sat in the Korova Milkbar trying to make up our rassoodocks what to do with the evening. The Korova milkbar sold milk-plus, milk plus vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom, which is what we were drinking. This would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.

4. Reservoir Dogs (1992)

A Tarantino film that revolved around a failed jewelry break-in. A group that called each other with colors instead of their names and All strangers to each other were hired for a burglary by Mr. White. Not all six of them survived the shootout. As the persons remaining was able to convene on the hideout, they began suspecting one of them is a police informant.

Love love the pure gangster chic. Especially that collective walk with them on suits. Bang bang bang.

5. The Big Lebowski (1998)

“The Dude” a careless hippie faced an anomaly regarding his car was forced to accept a one-time high-paying job for a rich man. The narrative gets even more odd and complicated when “The Dude” meets and accidentally sleeps with the rich man’s step-daughter.

This is the oddest of them all as the coolness and simpleness was so cunningly made to be iconic.

ALSO: BOWLING and Steve Buscemi

Therefore I conclude, I like movies that has badass and underground vibes. I don’t even know why I’m listing this.


Of changes

There is a storm brewing; I can already feel it in the small gaps of my everyday tasks. The 3rd cubicle of the office comfort room is now a witness.

The point of questioning, scaring and blaming yourself inside your head while doing casual things (like refilling your rocket ship water bottle from The Mind Museum in The Fort) is to somehow remind yourself how stupid and careless your life plans are; as if to mock those snippets you have in your head before you sleep or whenever you tell someone that your flight date is on the 23rd, when its really on the 27th.

You realize how fucked up you are when you tell different versions of the real story to different people AND THEN blame it on how you categorize your relationship with them (i.e, you told the guard from the Reception Area that you’re leaving because you just happened to have the opportunity land on your lap the moment you wished for some change to happen, but on your colleagues’ version you were somehow looking for it and then happen to land on the opportunity. Same luck, different tones)

There is a storm coming from all this blind happy indecisions. There is a spike somewhere in this bright cliff that you’re about to jump from.

Sometimes you think that announcing that you’re leaving is enough perk as it is because at least, you’ve finally gotten that god damn attention and praise and sweet begging for you to stay you think you’ll only get when you die. But the reality of you staying would leave your spirit dry kicks in.

Your heart is hammering from all the possibilities. You have never been shaken this hard before, and yet you stick to your plan. Leave, get a little of your dreams, leave and wish that you fulfill a bigger part of your dreams this time and then plan on leaving again.

Beating myself up

When I encounter my mishaps in all general things, I somehow make it a point to replay the scene/situation/conversation over and over again; as if I’m looking for another angle or another turn-of-events.

I always see this as something normal since I always over think in about everything in my life; and consequently, I’m feeling that I’ve already properly accustomed my psyche to it. In fact, I already have my own nickname for it: The shoulda-woulda-coulda mentality (hooray originality).

I don’t know. It’s hard to be stupid to the simplest of things.

I’m not making sense 😦